User talk:Tompkins

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So, this is it.

Oh really? --keitei, the Most High 18:40, 12 March 2006 (EST)
Well, according to that hierarchy thing, I'm pretty sure I'm higher than you. But, I could be reading it wrong... Tompkins 18:41, 12 March 2006 (EST)
Well, isn't that your doing? --keitei, the Most High 18:43, 12 March 2006 (EST)
Actually, no... I don't know who that was. Heh, I've been infoing everyone on IRC, but I still haven't found that IP. Tompkins 18:43, 12 March 2006 (EST)
Haha! You've got a secret admirer! Bet it was Lir *snicker* --keitei, the Most High 18:51, 12 March 2006 (EST)
SHHH! You have to be careful, this will actually be part of Uncyclopedi someday, maybe... ish. Tompkins 18:52, 12 March 2006 (EST)


RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!!!! --Hinoa 19:35, 12 March 2006 (EST)

I have succesfully adjusted the hue and/opr tint on my computer. It no longer displays red. You lose. Tompkins 19:36, 12 March 2006 (EST)
RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY! --keitei, the Most High 19:38, 12 March 2006 (EST)
Alright, but.. I mean... there's really nothing to b-OMG, A GIANT PIG WITH DIET PEPSI CANS FOR FEET, RUN! Tompkins 19:44, 12 March 2006 (EST)
Not one of those again! I thought I blew up the last one of them... *runs anyway* --Hinoa 19:46, 12 March 2006 (EST)


Thanks for adding the images to my excellent User I get an award for the most original Kakunesque page on UNMeta? -- Mhaille

I'm afraid that goes to Tood Lyons, for his UserPage entitled "User:Kakun". Better luck next time. Tompkins 08:36, 13 March 2006 (EST)


Hey there, Mr. Blue. We're so pleased to be with you. Look around, see what you do. Everybody smiles at you. Mr. Blue Liiiink. --Clown.gif clown Clown.gif 19:42, 13 March 2006 (EST)

You know, I thought that maybe, just maybe, there was a chance your singer would be better than your jokes. That dream has been crushed. Mr. "Blue Link" Tompkins 19:44, 13 March 2006 (EST)
What jokes? --Clown.gif clown Clown.gif 19:46, 13 March 2006 (EST)
Wow, suddenly... it all makes sense. MAYBE I SHOULD START TALKING LOUDER TO MAKE SURE YOU CAN UNDERSTAND HEAR ME. Mr. "Blue Link" Tompkins 19:47, 13 March 2006 (EST)
What the...somebody is spoofing me. --Rcmurphy 19:52, 13 March 2006 (EST)
OMG TEH SOCKPUPPETRY!!! I am sooooo gonna report you for this man. You're going down. Mr. "Blue Link" Tompkins 20:09, 13 March 2006 (EST)
You do, and everybody will find out who you really are. --Clown.gif clown Clown.gif 20:06, 13 March 2006 (EST)
Seriously - maintaining the status quo benefits the community. It doesn't matter to me if they think I'm three separate people... and really, the fact that there are three separate people (and that I don't know one of them at all) is irrelevant, unless I somehow become disruptive. And that's guaranteed not to happen. Mr. "Blue Link" Tompkins 20:09, 13 March 2006 (EST)

Header for the TOC[edit]

Or, if you like, "Heading toward the O.C." You know... like the T.V. show. Mr. "Blue Link" Tompkins 20:13, 13 March 2006 (EST)

Free eye exam![edit]

This is actually just a free eye exam.

So is this. ~ Ghelæ talkcontribs 12:10, 3 May 2006 (EDT)

Apologies from a former vandal[edit]

Dear Tompkins,

Ever since June 2006, I have been disappointed with myself because of with what I did to Uncyclopedia (and to a lesser extent, UnMeta) since April. Before then, it was never my intention to be an Uncyclopedia vandal. But April and May were some of the so called "dark ages" of my life. I suffered through massive bouts of depression and stress after getting numerous bad grades in high school and I feel that this is what brought on my vandalism to Uncyc.

But just before the school year ended (June 15th or so), I discovered the Uncyclopedia-IRC channel. Seeing as though I was still a vandal then, I thought I would stir up a little trouble on the Uncyclopedia channel. But when I got on the channel, there was this person called "Bradaway" who was mad at me because he got stuck in my rangeblock. He began throwing a bunch of insults at me, and saying that "people like you don't deserve the internet."

I was in shock after seeing this. I thought I was a likeable person because nearly everyone (probably 95% percent) at my school that I know think I am cool, kind, smart, generous, "un-self-centered" etc.. My teachers also think I am one of the best students ever. But when I got the message, I realized that I left a horrible impression on the Uncyclopedia community. Ever since then, I gave up on vandalism and decided that I want to talk to Splaka, but when I did manage to contact him, I didn't have much luck. All he said was "No, you need to stop smoking crack" (which I don't) and kicked me out of the Wikia channel without giving me a chance to actually discuss this matter.

Since I gave up on vandalism, I began coming up with a plan of good things that I would like to do on Uncyclopedia. First, I thought I would get rid of the list of all of the other names that I would use as vandal accounts. Then I began searching Uncyclopedia for things that could use improvement. I decided that I want to create a few new articles, such as , and (see this for reasons.) I also want to create a new Uncyc game called Legend which is almost finished with its planning stages.

I also feel bad for Bradaway and other users who are caught in my rangeblock. It's not fair that my actions got them blocked and people in the range were blocked even though I never used that range. I also don't know how to change my IP on the computer I use that's in the range (I have only had my IP on that computer change once and I have not been able to re-create that situation (and I don't want to bother to do so anyway.)) They don't deserve to be blocked. Because I am blocked, Uncyclopedia may have lost some excellent contributors for a while.

I am completely aware that you probably don't want to unblock me or shorten my block, and I am completely OK with that. I would, however, like to talk things out with a few administrators such as Splaka, Spang, Keitei, MoneySign, Todd Lyons, Rcmurphy, Elvis, Mhaille and whoever else I may have angered during that vandal spree. And again, if they don't want me unblocked, I'll be OK with it. The least that you could do for me is give Bradaway my apologies (to my knowlegdge, he can be found on the Uncyclopedia or UnNews channels), inform Uncyclopedia that I have given up on vandalism for good and will never hear see any more of those "on Crack" accounts, unblock the range, I never used this range and it doesn't need to be blocked, allow me to at least be accepted on the Uncyclopedia channels (I'll try to take any insults) and tell Splaka that he has my apologies and give him the Extreme DUHligence award for attempting to knock some sense into me during that vandal spree.

Please take what I have said into consideration. I don't want Bradaway and the others to be blocked because of my actions.

I am sorry for the sins I have committed on Uncyclopedia.


Richard H., the former crack vandal

P.S.: If you want to talk to me, I will hopefully be available on the UnNews channel (Richard53038 is my user name.)

I read the discussion on the Village Dump on Uncyc and I will be using the name "Richard53038" if/when I am unblocked.
Richard ( 22:46, 10 August 2006 (EDT)


Hello Tompkins, there is a new crew working on UnMeta, giving it a new purpose. After thorough deliberation with the other momentarily active admins, we concluded that

  • since you haven't edited here for a long time, haven't reacted to the latest changes and clearly have no intentions to be active here, and
  • since we want to make new start, and there would be confusion as to who is active here and willing to help,

it would be best for the transparancy of the wiki to relieve you of your duties. This will be affected as from now.

If you intend to again become active here, you can place a request for admin rights on the appropriate request page.

Yours truly, D. G. Neree 17:59, 13 July 2008 (UTC)